This is what everyone wanted, the HEAT, it's like a sauna. The mercury just keeps on rising. It's SO HOT. But how hot is it? Funny you should ask.

If you couldn't tell, it's hot out. As soon as you walk outside it feels like your in a sauna. Thanks to tripadvisor.com, I found some of the best "How hot is it?" jokes and made a list for you. Please feel free to use them any time you want over the next few days.

It's so hot... I saw a chicken lay an omelette!

It's so hot...  I saw a squirrel picking up nuts with pot holders!

It's so hot... I saw a funeral procession pull thru a Dairy Queen!

It's so hot... Jehovah's Witnesses started telemarketing!

It's so hot... I saw the Devil in Wal-Mart buying an air conditioner!

It's so hot... You can wash and dry your clothes at the same time!

It's so hot... I saw two trees fighting over a dog!

It's so hot... I saw a cop chasing a thief, and they were both walking!

It's so hot... Cows give powdered milk!

It's so hot... My thermometer goes up to "Are you kidding me?"

It's so hot... I bought a loaf of bread and before I got home it was toast!

It's so hot... I got condensation on my butt from the water in the toilet bowl!

If you've got a good "How hot is it?" joke, I'd love to hear it. Just post it in the comments below.

Here's a classic "How Hot Is It" segment from The Late Show With David Letterman:

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