Camp Getaway is a sprawling, adult fantasy come true. While the Kent, CT Camp offers family packages, they have something to offer for adults only and not in a creepy way. I've been flirting with them, courting them for years, and have yet to close business with them. I'm not giving up, baby. A-B-C -- Always be closing.

The camp's activities include but are not limited to:

  • Volleyball
  • Kickball
  • Softball
  • Basketball
  • Waterskiing
  • Wakeboarding
  • Rock rappelling
  • Ultimate Frisbee
  • Improv sessions
  • Hip-hop classes
  • Wine Tasting
  • Poker
  • Archery
  • Beer Pong
  • Flip cup
  • Slip & Slide
  • Slip & Slide kickball
  • Arts & Crafts
  • Cards Against Humanity

My head is spinning, because if you pair the activities listed above with the freedom of no children and being out in nature, you have Shangri-La. I have kids, and I love my kids, but sometimes you need a getaway and it sounds like Club Getaway has that -- it's even in the title. Q - What is better than my kids not being there? A - Your kids not being there.

I like to let loose with the expletives and tell an off-color story here or there. What I do not need is to do one or both of those things to happen and all the sudden realize your 9-year-old daughter is standing behind me. That's what is wrong with the world. We'd all (adults) get along a lot better if there was something for just us. I mean even Las Vegas is family friendly now! LAS. VEGAS. Everything does not need to be for everyone.

The folks over at Camp Getaway understand what I am saying, how I feel, and this is why we need to be in business together. Listen up, Club Getaway, and listen good, I am the guy to sell your camp and to sell it so good. You want someone with an established audience? You want someone with a 50,000 watt megaphone to sell your business with the enthusiasm of a child? I'm am your man and I'm not all that hard to find.

Call me, let's do lunch.

P.S. This is the last freebie, your move.